Lost pt.2

Oh...holy shit this show rocks!! Damn the six month wait.

Of time traveling bunnies

"Was he talking about what I think he was?"

"If you mean time traveling bunnies...then yes."

Lost is freaking awesome...I can't wait till January.

Greatest Baseball Play....EVER

One of the single greatest snags ever made on a ball diamond...and it was made by CUB, Rick Monday!

Monty Python Vol. 3

I promise...this is the last one (today)

Can't Stop the Python...

It's a disease I tell you!

More Python...

Ministry of Silly Walks, Live at the Hollywood Bowl.

SPAM, It's not just a joke anymore...

Spam sales rise as consumers trim food costs

According to Azcentral.com SPAM sales are on the rise, and I for one am Happy about it.

Mostly I like any excuse to post a topical Monty Python Video!

Calling Bob Villa...

Talk about your "Critical System Failure"

Astronauts on the International space station are dealing with the loss of a vital piece of equipment...the Space Toilet!

Seems the bastard broke down and that has caused a little problem for those aboard the ship. I personally have never tried to take a crap in zero gravity...but I would guess that it isn't as funny as it sounds!

Currently, according to MSNBC, "Until then, the current hardware — and the supply of "Apollo bags" for fecal collection — may have to suffice. And if previous experience is any guide, the Russian engineers and cosmonauts will find McGyver-type solutions to make it work."

I love the fact that the phrase, "McGyver-tpye solutions" found its way into an MSNBC story. What I love more is the fact that they spelled MacGyver wrong!

Note the correct version is with a Mac (not a Mc). Just saying!

Chuck Norris Pt. 2 -- Chuck Vs Bruce Lee

You have to love how fake the background is!

Chuck Norris Pt. 1 -- Chuck on Chuck...

If I am going to have a horrible Nazi movie trailer on my site...posted on Memorial day of all times...I have to balance it out with Chuck Norris...(First of Two videos)

Chuck on Chuck...

Worst movie EVER...

Sometimes you say something is the worst ____ ever...usually you are being overly dramatic. Not here....This is one of the top THREE worst movies of ALL TIME...However horrible you think the movie looks from the trailer, know this.

IT IS 1000 TIMES WORSE

if you feel the need to purchase it...and you shouldn't (take it from me) they can be purchased on Bestbuy.com

On a side note...the other two movies in the "SS Hell Pack" are the other top three!

T-Shirts...

Gotta love the two T-Shirts I saw the other day...

D-Bag of the Week

Just another reason to not drink and drive....Or drink and use your phone.

You thought it was bad the last time you got drunk and called an ex-girlfriend/boyfriend. How ab0ut this guy.

Check out the video to find out why this guy has pulled down the award (for last week).

Not really sure if I should feel sorry for this guy or what?

Strange...

You may be asking yourself why there is a severed right foot on my blog...

Well...here is the reason

DeNiro SNL Open...

Just had to share...

Ameircan Idol?

The question is: "If no one watches the finale is that person still your American Idol?"

Next year I want a contest for "America's Most Villafied"....pick out the most hated person in America...

Sounds like a show that would slide in nicely at FOX

Reading is hard...

Ever glanced at a headline and thought...wow, that's odd! Only to find out that you apparently didn't read it right at first glance?

That just happened to me...

I thought the headline read: Officer's Breast Feeds Victims

Not knowing what the hell that was about I thought, "wow, gotta read that story!"

What the headline actually said was: Officer Breast Feeds Victims

Equally a strange headline out of context...actually...kinda strange in context too!

D-Bag of the Week

We have a pair who get to share this weeks award....and the nice part is that they also share the story too!

BOULDER, Colo. - It wasn't exactly pistols at 30 paces, but police say a security company supervisor and a restaurateur shot each other with Tasers in a "bonehead" confrontation over parking....full story.

On a funny note...this was found on azcentral in the "Buzz" section.

Pepsi Stuff...Here's your $90 DVD

I love promotions that have you save points to get "free" stuff....

Pepsi Stuff is the nuts right now! You can't compete with the combo of Pepsi and Amazon. Coke rewards has nothing on this combo.

Gotta love the fact that for ONLY 90 pepsi points you can get a DVD!! Or if you really want to stretch your points you can get a season of many TV shows on DVD...for ONLY 90 Points..

Let's examine the cost of your Free DVD:

90 points off of 20oz bottles (1pt each) 90 bottles X $1.30 each = $117
90 points off of 12 packs (2pts per pack) 45 12 packs X $3.00 each = $135
90 points off of 24 packs (4pts per pack) 23 24 packs X $7.00 each (on sale!) = $168

Regular priced DVD $24.99 (on the HIGH side)
Regular priced TV on DVD $53.99 (general price)

So...I get the fact that these "FREE" prizes are set to help you get something out of drinking the products that Pepsi rolls out the points on....but that is kinda sick. And this is coming from a guy who is sitting on 560 pepsi points....you do the math!

Would you like fries with that?

Coming soon to a Things JK Eats Blog near you....I DARE YOU!! For the record this is the Burger King on North Prospect in Champaign, IL.

Tyler...you have to thank your Aunt (or whoever sent you this)!!

You got Knocked the F-ck out!

My guess is that Suge Knight was dumb enough to ask this "barber" for the old Wesley Snipes, Passenger 57 Fade and that's what got him the ass whoopin' earlier in the week.

But seriously...who the Frack thinks its a good idea to cold cock Suge "Mutha Phukin' " Knight. I can't tell you a lot about the state of Hip Hop these days...and "The Row" isn't what it used to be...but seriously!

Somewhere, behind a locked door...with the lights out...under the covers...still sitting in his own urine...Vanilla Ice is laughing.

***Wiki entry...It was widely reported that Van Winkle had been threatened and assaulted by Death Row Records CEO Marion "Suge" Knight, who had demanded that royalties for "Ice Ice Baby" be paid to Mario "Chocolate" Johnson, a Dallas rapper and former associate of Knight who claimed that he had co-written the single.

The story is that assault included being hung upside down off of a 15th story balcony...who's laughing now!***

Can you Hear me now?

Damn...I want to know what cell service this guy had?

Turns out he was arrested when his Southwest flight landed in Dallas....because he wouldn't get off his cell phone...while the plane was in flight! Ironically, "Jones did not immediately return a phone call from The Associated Press seeking comment."

I can't get a signal in my freaking basement sometimes and this jack ass is getting mid flight service?! Hope he had nationwide roaming!

I survived the weekend...

Granted I didn't have a whole lot of doubt about making it through. But, It was more eventful than I thought it would be...by that I mean I actually did something...one day!

GO CUBS!!

Really there was only one minor near death experience on the way home from the game. But, that was the cars fault! We were undecided on Wendy's or White Castle....and the passenger seat made a split second decision!!

I have to say that I love driving in downtown Chicago...esecially when I am not the one doing the driving.

The one thing I realized is that there is one job, hands down, that I would never take....Window washer on a high rise!

Those guys are Fracking Nuts!

Must say that is a job I would rather leave to someone else!

I tried to see how many washers were out as we drove down Lakeshore Drive on the way to Wrigley..and the answer was...Too Many.

I would love to know what the actual statistics are on the number of window washers who have to be saved by the Chicago Fire Department each year!

I have a feeling that the number is staggering!

Once we finally got to Wrigley I decided to jump past the line to get you picture taken with Speed Racer (had it been Speed Buggy I may have stopped) to jump right to the "Mr. Cub" Ernie Banks statue.

My only regret is that I didn't head over to the other side of the park and snag of shot of the Harry Carey statue!

Not too bad a shot seeing as it was taken (as were all these photos) with my iphone. Great device....crappy camera! No zoom...no Video...but it serves its purpose!

Once we got inside, I have to say, I didn't think I was going to enjoy the game too much since I seats were WAY under the overhang.

Usually I like to sit in the Bleechers or down by the field. But, these seats were actually pretty good. Would have been great if the rain had come in...instead it was just BALLS COLD!

Nothing like baseball on May 9th in Chicago when the wind chill is 48 degrees. Wouldn't have been a problem if I had more than 20minutes notice that I was going to the game. Thank God I wore a long sleeve button up that day!

If I had any patience I would have stitched those together and try to make a better shot of the field...but I am too lazy to even attempt that!

Gotta say it was a great day at the ball park...Cubs won, I didn't freeze (or spend $100 on a hoodie) and Kerry Wood looked awesome in the 9th.

Finally two of my favorite shots at the ballpark...the first is Iconic ... Welcome to Wrigley!

Shot two is of the start of the line of smokers...who obviously don't believe the No Smoking sign applies to them...if there was a bounty on Smoking Ban violators...Wrigley would be the place to hang out!

It's not clear...but the No Smoking sign is right there on the pillar to the left of the guys head... either he can't read, or he doesn't care. I like to think he is stupid and can't read!

Cubs update!!

D.Lee home run to help put the Cubs up 3-1 bottom of the 8th. Gotta love this game! Great game..as long as the Cubs don't blow it in the 9th

Final game update via twitter. This live blogging is killing my iPhone battery.

Cubs...are killing me

Still plenty of time left in this one but these bums are really killing me. Oh and did I mention that it is about 52 with a good stiff breeze? This really doesn't feel like MAY! Cubs are now up 2-1 top of 7

cubs update

three innings in and the cubs are down 1-0. But, on the bright side I just had ballpark frank and an old style... Goodbye $10.00

Go Cubs Go

On the road to see the Cubs and Diamondbacks at Wrigley. What a nice surprise after the week I've had at work.

Guess I will try to live blog from the game.

I'm a Whore...

I really am a whore for whatever seems to be the new IT thing (as long as it won't cost me an arm and a leg).

When looking for a new car I was looking for a few things:

1) Great Gas Milage

2) Cool Factor (for a decent price)

3) Fun add ons

So I went with a 2008 Ford Focus 30+ MPG, decent price and look, Microsoft SYNC system and a free iphone!

When it came time get into gaming I had to grab the xbox 360 (which was the pimp shit at the time) but, I had to wait until I could get a great deal through Microsoft!

I have successfully upgraded my Ipod everytime a new model has come out...(sucker for apple).

Now I have jumped on the new blog fad...TWITTER. Not really 100% sure how committed I am to using it...but it could come in handy should I ever find myself thrown into an Egyptian jail.

Better to be safe than sory I guess!

D-Bag of the Week...

Well, really this is long over due...and by long I mean it should have been the day after the story broke last month! But, none the less we have a man who, in my opinion, beats out the guy who let his girlfriends ass grow around the toilet seat.

I can only be speaking of one man... Josef Fritz

AKA: Incest Dad (CNN.COM's title...not mine)

If you have no idea who I am talking about here is the short version of his story: He decided to tell his wife that their 18 year old daughter ran off to join a cult (or some such rubbish) when she was, in fact, locked up in the basement where he was keeping her as a love slave...and fathering seven kids with her! Nuff Said.

Congrats Josef...you are officially king of all Douche bags (probably never to be topped!).

TV Quote....

Not sure why this quote makes me laugh so much! But, here is the quote that keeps me laughing over and over right now!

"Ugh...it's going to take a shoebox full of blow to get me through this dreck."

I have to laugh my ass evetime I watch this episode...Just thought I would share..

I saw the sign (and it cracked my ass up)

Really, this is just more proof that Nash Bridges is one of the coolest shows of all time.

It is a little darker than I would like..but the sign says: Need Money for Pot, Booze, and Hookers, atleast I'm honest!

Somthing Wicked (haaard) This Way Comes...

***Please read title of blog with a strong Boston accent for max effect***

When hanging out downtown Champaign you never know what...or who you will run into!

Too much fun...

So I just had the chance to do something that I have always wanted to do....rip my father, Don Shields, a new one in public! But, in a good way!

Pops is retiring from teaching at the end of this year and the teachers thought it would be a good idea to have me "Roast" him during the teachers development day today! I had a great time...and even better...I got it on tape!

Not sure how long I went..but if I can get it on my computer I may have to post it here so that everyone who had my dad as a teacher/coach can enjoy!