Uncle Charlie

Sorry kids, I have some bad news to tell you. Are you sitting down? Good....

Uncle Charlie has gone crazy!

Now I know, you thought he was just a little strange, eccentric maybe. What with his cocaine and hooker fixation. But now he has gone over to a new level of crazy. I'd say I have to add a new level to my current scale of crazy.

As it sits the scale is as follows (from Lowest level to Highest):

Slightly off-- Run of the mill everyday insanity. Example: job has you frantic, kids won't shut up, life seems to be ganging up on you.

Nuts-- A little more than slightly off...there may actually be some emotional issues at play here. Example: these are the people who claim to talk to aliens, see portals to other worlds, and generally creep you out when you see them talking to themselves in public

Crazy-- Here you have serious lapses in judgement. Usually followed by a period of "normal" activity. Example: Nick Nolte, Mel Gibson and most other celebrities.

Nic Cage Bat Shit Crazy-- Not actually saying that Mr. Cage is crazy...but he does play a crazy person in the movies...and rather well too! Example: Gone in 60 Seconds, Snake Eyes....pretty much anything done in the last 15 years!

That is where the chart used to cut off. But, now...thanks to Uncle Charlie we have added a new level. Bat Shit Nic Cage Crazy is no longer the gold standard. Now I unveil....(Drum roll please.....)

Charlie "Tiger Blood" Sheen out of your fucking mind, Mel Gibson is thankful he isn't you, Balls Ass Crazy!!! -- This is some next level shit! Example: Charlie "Tiger Blood, Adonis DNA, Winning, Warlock, Vatican Assassin" Sheen.  Granted I may need to find a shorter title or an abbreviation for this one as it doesn't roll of the tongue quite as nice as Nic Cage Bat Shit Crazy does..

Hopefully Uncle Charlie gets his act together before he ends up another tragic Hollywood footnote like John Belushi, James Dean and Marilyn Monroe. There is still hope though that he could come out on the other side of this thing like only a handful really have.  This is very similar to the start of the road that Robert Downey Jr. was heading down about 11 years ago! Fingers crossed!!

On a side note if you are enthralled by all things Charlie Sheen you can catch him on the road! That's right... Charlie is taking his show on the road! "My Violent Torpedo of Truth / Defeat Is Not an Option Show." Opens with a show in Detroit and one in Chicago and possible future dates TBD.  Sign up now if in the area $35 gets you a ringside seat to this three ring circus/train wreck!!